Gary Rutherford

1. My Substance Use Problem [4’40”]

Gary explains that he is 12 years in long-term recovery. He had various issues when he was younger, namely a lack of self-confidence and low self-esteem, and he was experiencing a great deal of anxiety. He was bullied at school. He used various substances to manage these problems and his social landscape, and to feel accepted. Alcohol was his main drug of choice as it was freely accessible. He also dabbled with prescription medicines a lot. He became reliant on these substances over the years, resulting in great chaos and destruction in his life.

Drinking was ingrained in the Northern Ireland culture at the time. Gary’s drinking spiralled out of control, so by the age of 30 he had a failed marriage, had lost jobs, and accumulated criminal convictions. He had broken his back and lost parts of his hand in various alcohol-related accidents. He had experienced a number of hospitalisations and clinical detoxes and been in various residential rehabilitation centres. He really wanted, and needed, to change. 

Gary emphasises that he had a great upbringing, wonderful parents, and a lot of love at home. He didn’t suffer any major trauma growing up. He just came from Northern Ireland:

‘… we have a lot of anxiety and trauma in our society. I was afraid of everything, and I just found something that worked for me at that age. But the problem for me is that it was that immediate connection with alcohol was so destructive… it was so passionate. And I chased it, and I looked after it, and I longed after it…’

2. Cultural Context & Personal Ownership [3’24”]

Gary was a drummer in a pipe band that was involved in competitions every Saturday. People started drinking the second they got off the bus on competition days. He was associated with older people in that situation and wanted to fit in. He then started getting jobs in bars. At 14 years of age, he was coming home at 02.00 after collecting glasses and drinking beer, then going to school that morning. ‘I took full advantage of the opportunities that were presented.’

Gary then moved from working in local bars to a nightclub in town. He explains that when you come from a culture where drinking is so socially acceptable, then it is easier to hide your own drinking. He had his first conversation about alcohol dependence at the age of 17. And he didn’t get sober until he was 30. So, he navigated the drinking realm for a good number of years.

Gary romanticised his relationship with alcohol and drugs. He loved drinking over a long period of time, until he obviously didn’t love it because it was causing so many problems. He almost made his relationship with alcohol, ‘My purpose. My purpose was to be the last one home.’

3. Setting Up ARC: Heart & Desire [8’55”]

Gary eventually got sober and retrained as a nurse. He became a psychiatric nurse in a mental health crisis service, working with guys who were acutely ‘really unwell’. He then started working in an addiction service. He felt that he ‘had landed’; this is where his purpose had got him, and this was going to be him forever.

The latter was clearly not to be the case. Gary experienced different types of recovery programme—12-Step recovery, person-centred recovery, and Christian-based recovery. But for him, the biggest game changer was physical activity and exercise. He emphasises that there has been about forty years worth of research showing the positive effects of physical activity and exercise on people who are struggling psychologically.

Gary describes how his friend Tim came around to his flat four weeks after his last relapse into drinking and dragged him to a running club. The run was awful!

‘It was cold, and it was wet, and it was muddy. And I was unfit. I didn’t even look like a runner, and I puked after the session. And I was like, “That’s me. Never again. I’m retired. I’m done from running.” But Tim, also a person in recovery, he knew a wee bit better. And he came around the following week. And with some gentle persuasion and a swift kick in the backside, I found myself back at the running club the following week.’

Gary found this run a little bit easier and he didn’t die! This was enough for him to go back again… and then again… and again He was soon attending the club regularly.

‘… my identity started to shift from being somebody struggling with addiction, to being somebody who focused on their health and who loved to run. And I was surrounded by people who saw me through this different lens, and that was refreshing for me because I had always been under the impression throughout my recovery that this long-term condition was going to follow me everywhere and be the defining thing about me. And it wasn’t. And then, of course, through the exercise, self-esteem, self-worth, self-confidence, all the things that addiction had stripped away over the years, started to come back. And I loved it.’

Gary believes that many people go into treatment and therapy when they are not foundationally ready. They are just out of chaos and are exhausted and are not sleeping and eating properly. Just like a house needs a foundation, recovery needs a foundation—physical, emotional, and nutritional—before a person can start unpacking all their years of trauma and pain. And that’s where the idea of ARC came from. Another key point underlying Gary’s approach was the identity shift that he felt from other people seeing him as a person with a problem, and not a problematic person.

Gary was advocating for recovery through his social media accounts, describing his own journey and promoting hope. But things never went further because his life was so busy. He started indoor climbing and one of the guys pointed out that he had seen one of Gary’s Facebook recovery posts. He had a friend who was struggling. He asked Gary if he had ever thought of setting up a specific page about recovery.

Gary went home and created a recovery page… that one conversation whilst climbing indoors was the catalyst to creating ARC. Wulf emphasises that such serendipitous moments are so important in the developmental journeys of recovery communities.

Gary created a signposting page for local organisations and reputable personal trainers who were able to support people. Within two weeks, people were trying to refer themselves to Gary. He wasn’t expecting that. He decided to become a personal trainer and advertised for six people who wanted to start a six-week journey of sobriety through physical activity. His local gym allowed him to use their space for free to deliver this first programme. A lecturer friend helped him develop some outcome measures. They used the GAD-7 anxiety/stress scale and the PHQ-9 depression/mood scale, as well Kings College’s Substance Use Sleep Scale and Substance Use Recovery Evaluator. These questionnaires all revealed positive changes after participants completed the programme.

Gary was running his programme on his days off and in the evenings. He had no funding. At this stage, he did not have a clear directional goal. Key people he had met on his journey saw something in what he was doing, as well as his heart and desire. For Gary, it was all about helping people, not building an organisation at this stage. The other important thing was that there was a great need in his community at that time. Drug deaths were increasing, and people were getting fed up of having limited options.

4. Being Visible & Fair [5’58”]

Someone gifted Gary £5,000 and he was able to rent a tiny gym studio where he could train eight people. ARC was birthed from there. Programmes were run in the evenings, demand started growing, and the initiative was clearly visible on social media. Gary was very conscious of the fact that addiction and recovery are often in the shadows, and he wanted to make them far more visible by having open conversations about them.

‘… how do we expect people to reach forward, put out their hands and say they’re struggling if they feel that they don’t have the permission to be able to do that? So, let’s give people the permission.’

Gary believes that him being a nurse helped opened more doors and resulted in more options. He emphasises that he is not saying it has to be like that, but it seemed to be the case with him. He was getting busier, and more people were trying to join the programme. A community was then created. Gary points out that communities can be really difficult to manage. They are a pleasure to be part of but can be really difficult for the person who is trying to maintain and develop the community.

Gary got some extra funding and was able to free up Fridays for ARC. He went part-time after attracting more funding. Things were tough and frustrating for him when Covid first arrived. However, advantages became apparent. ARC was able to offer six rather than two fitness classes a week, and three or four group therapy sessions rather than one a week, due to delivery being online. It was able to connect more people and therefore numbers grew again.

Gary realised he now had to do a lot of work on himself. For example, he wasn’t a confident public speaker. He decided to create a ‘Thought for the Day’ video every day, which has resulted in over 300+ short films on YouTube that are focused on various aspects relating to recovery. These films really resonated with people and demand for ARC grew further. More funding was attracted.

ARC is now nearly five years old and has a team of 14 staff, of whom six are full-time. The team has three mental health nurses and two therapists. The majority of the people who work there have lived the meaningful experience of addiction, which Gary believes is really important.

He emphasises that people in recovery want to give back all the time, and that’s really important. However, their experience and work has to be valued properly. ARC treats recovering people as Facilitators and pays them for their time. Gary believes that it is easy for recovering people to be taken advantage of by organisations because of their passion and desire to give back. Wulf points out that if we don’t value recovering people for what they do, we perpetuate that myth that they are not as important as those working in the ‘professional field’.

5. ARC Fitness Today [4’06”]

ARC moved from being a six-week recovery programme to being so much more, particularly after gaining a corporate sponsor, an e-learning company from Derry, Learning Pool,  who really bought into the vision and the fact that ARC was trying to help people. The funding allowed Gary and his colleagues to move into a much bigger premises. ARC now has a fully functioning gym across two floors, with a strength area and conditioning area, studio area, and a yoga and Pilates space. The gym also has treatment and therapy rooms, offices, kitchen and showers/toilets.

ARC’s team have created a social space where people struggling with substances, and their families and supporters, can come. They have free walking groups that run twice a week, addiction recovery programmes for people directly affected by substance use problems, and family support programmes for those indirectly affected. The team do a lot of work in relation to workshops and education, as well as organise large-scale events that are community-based and highly visible. They hold a Recovery Walk in Derry, and 3km fun runs. They also hold the largest health event in the northwest of Ireland. Last year, they had brought 52 vendors together—addiction, mental health, and other support services. They run a conference every year. Gary emphasises that this is their way of coming out and being visible. Wulf just says: ‘Wow!’

Gary has been to the World Health Organisation, and has won the Royal College of Nursing’s, ‘Nurse of the Year’ Award. ’It’s a real privilege to be able to sit in this situation because it was a life that I never thought that I would see.’ He now knows it is okay to be somebody who has struggled. He wants to create a culture where it is okay to have an issue. He believes that when people see that, they get behind it. ARC has now created more demand for what they can meet because more people are reaching out. Meeting that demand is a challenge, says Gary.

Gary emphasises that while it’s been an interesting journey, it’s not been a walk in the park. He didn’t come with the skills to run a community voluntary organisation. It was never a setting that he had worked in. He had to learn really fast about funding, the politics of the community voluntary sector, and other matters.

6. The ARC Recovery Programme [7’41”]

Gary says that some people who have come to ARC have tried alternative recovery groups, but for whatever reason find them not to their liking. ARC has a week-long induction, followed by six weeks of physical activity, psycho-education classes and therapy sessions. Physical activity is not the only key element. It’s the combination of these different elements, and the community and its values and ethos.

ARC offersa structured programme that people come to from Monday to Friday, and optional on a Saturday twice a month. Outside of residential rehabilitation, it is probably the most consistent and in-depth programme available in Northern Ireland. ARC also has a closed peer-maintained group that is available 24 hours a day. Group therapy sessions are run by people who have lived experience. ARC also provides running therapy. It has Northern Ireland’s only dynamic running therapist; he is 14 years sober.

Gary emphasises that education is an important part of their programme. ARC helps people understand addiction, as well as its causes and biology. There is a strong Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) component, to help people understand their thoughts, behaviours, cravings, and the role of environmental cues. They have a good deal of education around mental health, as addiction and mental health go very much hand-in-hand, as well as education about living sober, problem solving, and being resilient. There is continuing measurement of outcomes as people go through the programme.

In addition to running groups, ARC also does one-to-one work. Staff are accredited by the Recovery Coach Academy in the UK. Trauma and CBT therapy are also available. ARC accepts that some people don’t want to get sober or stop using, so harm reduction work is offered. Obviously, there has to be some limits here. For example, the team can’t risk having people coming in and doing exercise after using two bags of cocaine and then having a stroke. Gary emphasises that there is no one-size-fits-all. ARC needs to meet people where they are at and provide various options.

Wulf points out that well-functioning recovery communities make it clear where their sober and abstinent spaces are, whilst also having a door that is open to all people. Community members must not feel vulnerable to drug or alcohol use.

Gary says that their walking group, which gets together twice a week, works well in this regard. There is no requirement for sobriety; just don’t come long out of your mind or drunk. Be respectful and if you’re politely asked to leave and come back another time, don’t get annoyed or upset. The walking group helps create some form of connection for all, and also helps the problem of the ever-increasing waiting list at ARC. Ten to 15 people are coming to the twice-a-week walking group now.

Gary points out that he is not a rules person, but he has had to sort certain rules and create a code of conduct. It’s so important that ARC remains safe. ‘If people don’t feel safe, they can’t be vulnerable, and if you can’t be vulnerable, I don’t think you can open up and grow and change.’

7. Accountability, Safety & Dealing With Relapse [8’38”]

Early on, Gary realised that there needed to be accountability within the organisation, and he needed to be accountable. He set up a Board which helped with accountability and safety matters.

Since then, they’ve had to deal with issues around inappropriate sexuality, criminality, and breaches of confidentiality. However, Gary points out that when you bring 60+ people from different backgrounds together, you’re always going to have issues. He feels that ARC has always done right by people. He has always made a point of never acting on his own. ARC’s code of conduct has played an important role. They don’t allow drugs or alcohol on the premises, and they don’t tolerate aggression or anger at any level.

Relapse has been one of the biggest challenges for Gary. He has had to create a relapse ‘structure’ and a relapse ‘pathway’. This is really important when there are lots of people on ARC’s waiting list, whilst others are on the programme but not engaging. It’s been hard for Gary, but at times he’s had to say to people that they have to step back and then return later. At the same time, he is aware that he personally lapsed and relapsed for two years before he found recovery.

When someone at ARC relapses, a team member sits down with the person, discusses the issue(s), does some relapse prevention work, and then checks in with the person two weeks later. If it happens again, the same things are done. The person also has access to help and support all the time. If the person relapses a third time, they are asked to re-engage with the programme in the future. And if it then happens after that, the team has to say to the person that they are probably not ready for this programme at that particular time. Is there anything else that the team might be able to offer?

Gary stresses that this is a very difficult situation. However, he currently has a waiting list of 200 people, so he has to ‘be fair’ for those people as well. Gary also points out that some people have done the programme on multiple occasions. He stresses that putting guidance in place to deal with relapse is one of the most difficult things he has dealt with since setting up ARC.

Wulf has found the issue of relapse in other recovery communities to be a difficult one. Things can become quite tense. The person may have good relationships with other community members before they relapse, but then various negative emotions can arise. Sometimes, it even becomes quite personal. Gary says that he can deal with the verbal stuff. He points out that people have come back to the programme after difficult situations arose. Whilst the situation has been difficult for him, he knows the programme’s integrity is key.

Wulf stresses how things have to change and be reframed as a recovery community grows. Things can’t be done in the same way with large numbers as they were with small numbers. Gary points out that is why leadership has to be so strong. He makes decisions regarding safety not only for people with whom they are working, but also for the team members. Boundaries are key.

8. Funding & Longevity [7’20”]

Gary points out that ARC does not have government funding. They receive core funding from the National lottery, but this does not cover all their costs. They have a lot of other funders. The funding landscape was one that Gary had to learn very quickly. ARC was very lucky that Learning Pool, a local company, came on board as a corporate partner early on.

However, ARC has to do a great deal of fundraising. For example, in 2021 they organised a ‘No Shame’ campaign, during which Gary ran five marathons in five days wearing a weighted vest that represented ‘shame’. He fractured his leg on the second day but continued running for the rest of the challenge. Typical all or nothing, ‘Man must finish this mentality and not walk right for 18 months.’

ARC also runs a hybrid model, with free and paid-for programmes. Ideally, Gary wants to give ARC Fitness away to everybody, which you can imagine is so frustrating for the Board of Directors, as ARC needs to be around for the future. The money is just not there for ARC to be free for everybody. However, that’s a difficult situation, as the public perception of you can change when you are seen to charge people. This issue is a worrying one for Gary, particularly as people have been so helpful. ARC couldn’t have grown in the way that it has if the people of Derry and the north-west of Ireland hadn’t got behind it like they have. Gary will always strive to offer ARC for free to everyone, but there will be times when that cannot happen.

With the Northern Ireland government not sitting for nearly two years, there has been no way for services to be commissioned. Now the government is sitting again, many letters and emails have been sent from ARC. However, Gary doesn’t think that government funding is the answer to ARC’s longevity. He thinks he will always have to be creative when working in the funding landscape. Wulf points out that some recovery communities do get some government funding, but they risk the problem of government trying to change them into something they are not.

Gary believes that ARC wouldn’t look the same as it is if it had been working in the statutory sector. For him, the real interesting thing is that the importance of recovery and community-based recovery, and the negative impact of stigma, are now recorded within policies and strategies. And ARC works well in relation to these matters, in addition to their education and public outreach. Gary hopes that ARC can impact further by bringing other people and organisations along on their journey, without losing who they are fundamentally. Recovery taught him that he doesn’t always know the answer, and he must ask for help when needed. It taught him that collaboration is so important.

The field became very competitive in Northern Ireland, as it probably is in other parts of the UK. Services have worked in their own silo and haven’t wanted other organisations in the same area of expertise. Gary’s philosophy is different. ARC makes everything invitational. They bring everyone in as partners. So, when they organise a Recovery Walk, they bring in all the addiction recovery organisations. ‘I think we all need to work better together…. Being good at what you do is okay, but other people are good at what they do.’

Gary says they’ve had to do a lot of work to change the philosophy of those around them. It used to be, “You’re here with us, you can’t go there.” It always annoyed Gary when he heard that sort of stuff. So, for him, working with other organisations is really important.

‘And maybe that’s how we look at the funding landscape moving forward. Maybe it’s less about, “Look at how great we are,” and more like “Look at how wonderful the services in the north-west of Northern Ireland are.”’